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Australia:

Old Almonds

An employee at a nursing home was regularly offered large jars of roasted almonds by one of her very elderly male charges. She appreciated the gifts (she loved almonds), but decided one day to put her foot down - it really wasn't appropriate for a patient to keep giving her gifts. When she approached him about it, he said, "Oh those almonds - they cost me nothing. My family brings me chocolate-coated almonds every time they visit, but I can't chew them, so I just suck the chocolate off them."

Thanks to Damon Roberts for this one

 

 

Brazil:

The Harvested Children

Homeless children are often "adopted" by a US or European agency where they are put into comas and they're organs are harvested as needed by the wealthy.

Thanks to Jose Madeira Garcia

see Central Station or Central do Brasil

 

South Africa:

The Helpful Children

A woman had just finished grocery-shopping when a group of homeless children offered to help her to her car. After loading her groceries one of the children asked the woman for a tip, grateful she obliged. As she was about to drive off a man ran up to her and told her to go directly to the police station, one of the children had locked himself in the boot to ambush her later with a knife!

Thanks to Clinton Ashworth for that one

BTW for us Americans a boot is the trunk of the car. :)

 

The United Kingdom:

Numerous Rolls Royce production plants around the country are actually secret nuclear weapons facilities.

An Oxford/Cambridge philosophy paper once asked only one question; "Is this a question?" The response "No, but this is an answer," won a top First!

Thanks to MAFMR for these

No one is allowed to die in the House of Commons.

Thanks to Annastasia for this one

 

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