Anti - ATM

Someone is poisoning ATM envelopes with cyanide.

Booby-Trapped Toilets

A zero-population-growth terrorism group called "No More" has been setting up little guillotines under the rims of public toilet seats. When a pressure sensor senses someone sitting on the toilet a razor-sharp blade slashes across the front half of the toilet with the purpose of damaging/removing the victims testicles.

Cheap Terrorist

A terrorist didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb. It came back with "return to sender" stamped on it. Confused as to what it was, he opened it and was blown to bits.

Halloween Poisonings

Every Halloween children die from eating candy poisoned by sadistic "treaters".

-Although razor blades and needles hidden in apples are relatively common.

The Klingerman Virus

Someone has been mailing large blue envelopes marked "a gift from the Klingerman Foundation". Inside the package is a sponge that contains a virus that leads to extreme dysentary.

9-11

There were no taxis around the World Trade Center at the time of the attack.

The next terrorist attacks will stem from 7-11 stores on the date 7/11.

People "in the know" have been warned not to drink Coca-Cola after June 1st.

Payphone Poison

Gang-members are swabbing the buttons and receivers of pay telephones with a deadly combination of LSD and strychnine.

Theater Seats

Several people have been stuck with AIDS-infected needles while sitting in movie theater seats. Sometimes the trapped seats have a note on them welcoming the person to the world of AIDS.

Waterslide Traps

Many children have been seriously injured by razor blades stuck to the walls of waterslides with bubble gum.

Y2K Hate Crimes

The FBI has released a report that starting in the beginning of the year 2000 several white-supremist groups plan to shoot minorities on sight.